Know what, my days of contrasts might splice up the boredom factor, but they're bouncy up and down to a ridiculous level today, and I wish they'd stop for a bit.

BAD. Overslept this morning, late into work. Wouldn't have minded if I'd have been pissed last night but I was healthy and off to bed in good time

GOOD. Made it through with a bit of credibility; there's an opportunity for secondment with a deep search team and they've put me in for it. Danger, fun and muck. It'll mean breathing apparatus so lets hope the quack's a good news guy later.

BAD. Parking at the doctors surgery. Drove around fizzing for ages trying to find a gap anywhere in a half mile radius that wasn't full of codhead car. Gaaah.

GOOD. The doctors. For those that are curious, I've got cancer of the arse and have six days to live. No. Only joking. It just seems that way after a night on the Broadside ale. My quack (who I've never met before and actually took an instant dislike to) reckons it's weight related (don't they always), possibly my fitness has just run down to a certain extent. That might make sense actually, the amount of time I've spent stuck on this machine in the last several years. Cat allergy is unlikely, he's sending me for an x-ray to make sure it's not coal dust from work (I work near a couple of million tons of stockpiled coal imports, the dust gets everywhere). Apparently, even in my current wretched state, I've still got above average lung function (jeeez, what do you have to do to get crap lungs) and that was from a huff 'post horrible lurgy, that I didn't think was anywhere near good enough. Mind you, still think it'll do no harm to get the cleaners in and beast this house out good and proper, ingrained dust, cat hair, cat smell etc.

BAD: My plane ticket to Jersey that I tried to cancel is non refundable. Doh. It's not like I can go on the trip now, or anything. Even if I wasn't prevented for reasons obvious to those that know me, on the day I was supposed to be coming back, I'm supposed to be in Ippo planting that dead female relly of mine. So I'm sixty quid refundless, tripless and just a small bit annoyed. Not much, 'cause you have to keep sane about these things, especially if you've got my record for flipping out over trivia to improve, but none the less.... d'oh.

Look here Life, I appreciate the importance of balance in all things, but could you quit it for a bit here? I feel like a bloody yo-yo. By which I do not mean I expect a dozen of the things to arrive by post tomorrow, folks. And if we're working on the balance issue here Life, don't you think you need to give me a lottery win to at least start to make up for last month?????