Shite TV comes to my house

Phil and Fern. Loose Women, featuring that appalling harridan that apparently used to be married to that ginger thing Evans. Jerry Fucking Springer, and his studio full of reasons we aught to give Al-Qaeda chemical weapons and nukes right now. How on earth has this come to pass in MY castle, my shelter from bullshit, my sanctuary? Ah, that'll be what happens when you relax your grip on the remote for two seconds and you've let a doris under your roof....